Bug hut tharepy

Before you view the attached photos an explanation is required.  We have a “screened in” gazebo in our yard at the lake.  The “ladies of the lake” (our female friends and neighbors) like to congregate in the gazebo after dark on weekend nights.  What exactly goes on remains a mystery to me because no males are allowed to be present at these gatherings?  There is a large amount of laughing, giggling, and even a shriek now and then.  There are usually two people present that I do not know.  Their names are “Margaret” and “Rita” I suspect that copious amounts of spirits are consumed because of these two.  The “ladies” all insist that what goes on is referred to as BHT.  I just found out that acronym stands for Bug Hut Therapy.  

The activity is so popular that the ladies decided to commemorate the BUG HUT with a stone plaque that will be installed next to the gazebo door.   The engraved stone plaque simply states BUG HUT and has a picture of a martini glass.  The first picture below was taken during the presentation which was fittingly taken at our Halloween party this fall.

The second picture was taken On Christmas day here in Naples.  That plaque was made from a spare piece of bathroom paneling, some old valentine decorations and some spare stencil letters.  We thought it fitting that our lake friends should be able to enjoy “BUG HUT” throughout the year, especially when it is cold and snowy up north.  Note that it is always five PM here in Naples.

With tongue firmly in cheek;   Dal

Translation

I am really surprised that there is such uproar about the sign translator that was employed by South Africa during the recent memorial service for Nelson Mandela.  People complained that his gestures were complete gibberish.  Being somewhat knowledgeable about signing I can state that nothing could be further from the truth.  Almost everything that President Obama said during his address was signed clear as a bell.  For example:

The first thing that the president did was to quote George H.W. Bush when he said, “Read my lips”.  Did you not catch that?  The second quotation was from one of his many speeches, i.e.  “If you like your insurance, you can keep your insurance”.  I thought the translator nailed that one spot on.  The next one was again from one of his speeches.  I did not catch it all but I did see “most transparent administration”.  The fellow doing the signing was giggling so much that his movements were a bit blurred.

Last but certainly not least was the quotation from Bill Clinton’s statements before the congress during his impeachment proceedings, “I did not have sex with that woman”.  I am sure that if you view one of the many reruns we have seen of the translator you will surely agree with me.

Dal

Situation in Syria

The current administration policy in Syria reminds me of a joke I remember from long ago when I was a kid.  It seems there was a farmer that had a pet goat and a pet monkey.  The animals were good pals and the farmer kept them in a pen together.  It seems that the goat developed a bad case of diarrhea.  The farmer, not wanting to make a mess of things and to also protect the monkey, placed a corncob in the goat’s rectum.  Problem solved?  No, it seems the corncob caused extreme pressure on the goat’s lower bowels.  The monkey, being a curious animal and somewhat playful, grabbed the corncob and removed it from the goat’s rear.  Get ready for this!!

The last scene showed the goat chewing it’s cud with a relieved expression on its face.  The monkey was holding one hand over his eyes and blindly stabbing the air with the corncob attempting to replace it in the goat’s rectum.

Can you draw a better analogy? 

twerking

I am sure that the term ‘TWERKING” has you confused as it does me since we learned of it due to a dance performed by Myley Cyrus.  I consulted my trusty American Heritage dictionary for some help.  I could not find the term “twerking” but I did find several similar words starting with “TW “that may shed some light on the subject.

 

First there is the work TWERP.  That is defined as a small person.

Next there is TWIDDLE.  That is described as “to twirl or rotate without purpose”

Then there is the word TWEAK.  That definition is to “twist sharply”

Lastly there is TWINGE.  That is a sharp sudden pain.

 

From the above I think it is only fair to say that TWERKING is the act of a small person rotating without purpose while twisting sharply resulting in sharp sudden pain

 

Glad to be able to clear that up.   Dal

Gun Control

Dal Wolf, Naples
Tools of foolishness
I read with interest the article about universal gun registration in the letters to the editor in Thursday’s edition of the Daily News.
The letter did not go far enough in the effort to register weapons!
It is known that baseball bats, hammers and even screwdrivers cause more violent deaths each year than do handguns in the hands of their rightful owners. Should we then not register those weapons?
We could even place restrictions on the number of blows possible by those weapons. A baseball bat would only be able to be swung one time each 30 seconds without an automatic timer being reset. A hammer could be set to only administer two or three blows without being reset.
This might be unhandy for a carpenter, but then he might be allowed a special dispensation. There could even be a special level of licensing for tack hammers, carpenter hammers and sledge hammers. Screwdrivers could be adjusted to only function in a rotational motion.
The problem is that any of the above weapons, in the hands of someone bent on a violent action would be worthless, as would a universal licensing of all firearms by the federal government.

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